My Dear John Letter
Dear John (a/k/a G.O.P.):
I have looked back at our relationship and I've decided it's just not working for me. We've grown apart. If this was meant to be a gracious break-up I'd take part of the blame, but I'm not in a merciful mood: It's all YOUR fault. That might sting but it had to be said.
You told me that you were fiscally conservative, but you've raked up so much debt that I'm not sure we'll ever get back on track.
You lied to me and pushed for a war under false pretenses, and then you intended to stay there "until we win" when you couldn't even tell me what "winning" would look like.
You cheated on me with James Dobson, and you allowed him to take over our relationship.
You weren't good at resolving our differences of opinion; when we'd argue, you just accused me of not loving my country.
You saw me pulling away, so you tried to lure me back with Sarah Palin and Joe the Plumber. Do you really underestimate my intelligence that much? That really opened my eyes... I thought I meant more to you than that.
Oh, you say you want me back -- Bobby Jindal told me. http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=96945319
But getting back together just won't work. You've changed -- you're not the person I fell in love with 28 years ago. Besides, you've lied to me so many times that I'm not sure the offer is sincere. It's very clear that we are not the right people for each other at this time in our lives.
If you think I'm only leaving you because I've been lured by another guy, nothing could be farther from the truth. I want my Independence. I'm moving into a new phase in my life.
I hope you don't see this as losing something, but rather as having gained knowlege and wisdom. Whatever happens, I just want you to know I've installed new locks and changed my phone number. Don't try to call me.